Today is Thursday, January 27, 2009.
I'll be the first to admit that I think I know all about a lot of things that I don't know shit about. Still, the concept amazes me. Quite obviously, there's nothing like moving to nyc to understand how little, in fact, you actually know.
"It's so expensive there."
"Yeah, I know."
"You're going to have to start at the bottom, career-wise"
"Yeah, I know."
"Don't expect to fall perfectly into a new group of friends, and dont expect _______ to become your best friend just because you're living there."
(Ouch) "Yeaah, I know."
...And on and on went the warnings. From friends, from relatives, from coworkers, from strangers, and basically from everyone. Before I left Colorado, one or two of my friends quietly pulled me aside to "tell it to me like it is." "Listen..." they'd say, "I don't want to sugarcoat this for you..." Then, they'd start in about the hard knocks of life.
The truth is that taking a leap of faith in your life, of moving to the next level, phase, chapter, place --whatever you want to call it, is mostly about facing your fears. At the last minute, when you've planned all you can plan and you've saved all you're capable of saving, you say in your head "Ah, fuck it," and jump into the unknown. As a wise woman I know once said, no matter what happens, "It IS better to live your life, rather than sitting on the sidelines." Happy Friday, everyone! I'll leave you with this note I got recently from a friend:
Linds,
So, I am sitting here wishing that I did not have to disconnect earlier so I thought I would make you a list of things that we would have talked about had that conversation been longer ...or you were here to slurp maragritas (oops, maybe I have had a few already!) and hash it all out. Plus, I like to preface things and I thought you might enjoy some frank, writing for a change. Anywhooooo, I was thinking about all of the things that are going on with your move, and imagining how you are processing it (and knowing in the way that I do). So there's my preface in a nutshell.
See, it was a survival mechanism to try and create, if you will, your life in NY before you went. With that comes expectation and suppositions about what will unfold. ...Well, essentially NY was like, "Nope- I am wiping the slate clean to create it for you. And its my way or the highway," pretty much. I mean, life is what me make of it, but this is the BIG APPLE, for reals. So enjoy the ride babe, cause the creativity falls in the process and you need every ounce of creativity you posses right now.
Also, remember how capable YOU ARE of handling the worst kind of bosses, financial insecurities, and all of the other curve-balls that life throws you at the same time. I mean all of this prep that you have done has just been gearing you up for the biggest juggling act of your life! So go ahead-take a picture of your crappy day, wallow in the miserable weather, make blueberry muffins from scratch and swear they were the best ones you have ever had (even if they arent). This is YOUR NY and YOUR time. its the stuff that lets you know you are alive, in case you forgot, lol.
Love you,
Nicole
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