New Friends In Unexpected Places (And A Few To Boot)

OUI! So many, many things... Today is Friday, March 26. My last post was a downer. I'm not even going to reread it. In the end I was so sick of looking at my crappy sentiments that I published it unfinished, whiney and melodramatic. Ew. Today is a new day. Ready for a not-so-PC, ADD-style installment of Linda's Life? Here goes, in hot new rewind stylee...

Entertaining.
Monday night Danee and I went to Upright Citizens Brigade for my friend Oren's comedy show, Front Page Films. Despite the pouring rain, we managed to slip into some open seats a few minutes after the start of the show. My favorite segment? A candlelight ballad, sung by the group's red-haired counterpart. The song's about writing lies in your diary --your Liary. Is hillarious and brilliant and hats off to a much-needed laugh. Performing on stage looked like so much fun.

Even More Entertaining.
Being at the same party with the girl who slept with the guy I liked while they were in Thailand (GWSWTGILIT). Oh wow, that sentence has filth written all over it, I'm going to go wash my hands...

Most Entertaining.
Managing uncomfortable emotions in public places (read: rage. Though may include snot-sobbing sadness). In other words, playing a game I like to call "acting mature": saying hello to the GWSWTGILIT and giving her a hug. And by "entertaining," I mean completely fcuking excrutiating.

Crazy-making.
Let's talk about a few things that happen to me that don't seem to happen to anyone else... By the time I walk from the train to my office every morning, my skirt makes its way 180 degrees to the right, around my body. A couple times, it has even twisted my shirt along with it. I dont know which is worse: trying to akwardly readjust as I'm walking down the street or walking into the office with my clothes on sideways. Is troubling. Here's another question: what is it about the left stocking that makes every pair of tights I wear so uncomfortable on one side and not the other? I wear them a lot. I notice these things. Just saaying...

Sarah Palin is so gimmicky.

...Sorry, I got distracted by her cheerleading antics on tv right now. Blah

Refreshing.
Following a particularly harrowing week of work recently, something incredible happened. At once, the tides changed, the sea parted, and the skies cleared ...ALL...BECAUSE I PLAYED COMPETITIVE GOLF IN HIGH SCHOOL. Whaaa? Yes. Now in most situations I dont really consider this a cool thing to brag about, but when I do occassionally let the cat out of the bag, its a tremendous hit. Especially with two CBS News executives --one of whom "kidnapped" me for a field trip last Friday to the driving range at Chelsea Piers. They've nicknamed it "the most expensive driving range in the country," and if right now you can't imagine anyone classier than me, you should know one more thing. I had to kick off my heels, roll up my pants, and go barefoot!

Speaking of Fridays... I'm out of here! Have a great weekend, everyone. I'll write soon ...so many adventures, so easily distracted. xx

A Long Way From Last Year

Happy St. Patty's Day, everyone! In honor of this delightful holiday I'm going to dedicate no part of this blog to beer, shamrocks, leprechauns or Irish trivia. (For the facts, see here.) I was visiting New York, however, this time last year, so it is remarkable to think of how much my life has changed since then.

This time last year I was living in Boulder, working for a financial planning and was about a week away from being unexpectedly laid off --yikes! As turmultuous as the incident was at first, the circumstances gave birth to one of the best summers of my life (in fact, my last in Colorado), prompted my "volunteership" at Warren Miller Entertainment, and was the catalyst that finally motivated me to move to New York!

Now here I am, Day 111, knowing one thing for sure: I probably would've never made this move if I knew how hard it was going to be. (Ha!) But seriously, I'm not saying that I regret moving because I don't regret it at all. I'm just surprised by how quickly (and rather naievely) I have brought myself face-to-face with some of the toughest challenges of my life. My naievite is melting away faster than you can say the word, and I'm just hoping that my positive outlook doesn't wash away with it.

One of the main reasons why I haven't written lately is because I'm afraid of what I might say (frustration is a 4-letter word?). I've been put through the wringer a bit, so I needed to put things in a little broader perspective first.

Stomach Ache

Today is Tuesday, March 2 and I don't know what my problem is. I can't satisfy my craving for pizza ...and pasta...ribolita...more pizza ...french bread rolls ...chicken and sausage gumbo... I don't know what's happening to me, but I can tell you that I'm putting an end to it tomorrow! This all started two weeks ago when my boss was out of the office.

She left me specific instructions to order cupcakes for the President of CBS News and Sports, for his birthday, the day after she left. No big deal and considering I'm on the unofficial hunt for the best cupcake in nyc, I thought it would be fun to try a new place on the Upper West Side and sample one myself. FUN, that is, until that day turned out to be one of the worst, slushiest, snow-stormy days and none of the bakeries would deliver.

Knowing the answer in my heart, I decided to ask one of the other assistant's for her opinion of the sceniario. "Definitely order from a place that delivers," she suggested. Since every bakery from here to Queens told me I was out of my mind (well, one place offered to deliver for an extra $30), guess who had to drag herself outside in the slush? Yours truly, Linda Super Assistant: committed to excellence in the face of every Noreaster.

I flagged the first cab to Columbus Avenue Magnolia Bakery, picked up six cupcakes, and turned right back around. After sloshing through the lobby on a mission, I carefully composed myself and triumphantly opened the door to the President's office.

...Who had already left for the day.

My heart sank as his assistant shrugged somewhat sympathetically. "Don't tell (your boss," she said. "It's okay. He will get them tomorrow when he comes in, and will be even more excited."

But, no. To make matters worse, the next day was the start of Lent, and he had given up cupcakes for the next forty days. Which is what I'm going to have to do if I keep up with all this pizza and pasta and absolutely delicious Magnolia cupcakes!

Following Operation Hope-My-Boss-Never-Finds-Out (which, of course, she did), a box of 16 Magnolia cupcakes were delivered to our office as a thank you gift. Having your first choice (well, second choice) of 16 exquisitely-frosted, deeeelicious delights is almost too much to bear. But I managed to limit myself to one the first day and two "try" bites of reject cupcakes leftover on the second day. (Don't order the caramel-whatevers or the carrot cake ones with pasty cream-cheese frosting. Ask Jen. It tastes like glue.)

Yesterday there were birthday cupcakes from Cupcake Cafe for an executive's birthday down the hall. Let me just say that these were much easier to resist. Cupcake Cafe specializes in (admittedly, beautiful) butter cream flowers that, luckily, do nothing for me. I brought one back to my desk to be polite, but promptly threw it in the trash.

And JUST when I thought that I was in the clear... finishing off my healthy greek yogurt breakfast... in walked another coworker with a box of donuts! I'm tempted to find out from her where they came from (because the half of half of one, followed by the half of another that I tried, was amaaaazing), but I don't trust myself. By midmorning I had a stomach ache and by now it looks like Hansel and Gretel ran circles around my office all afternoon.

I rounded out the afternoon with a delicious slice of pizza from Casabianca, across the street from my office, and (gasp) half a diet coke. Is it just me or is there something about working in an office that makes you crave a crappy, diet soda? Ick. Enough of that fizz, I'm going to punish myself with a CoreFusion Yoga class tonight at Exhale. The only other time I took this class, my quads were so sore I couldn't walk right for three days. It's the only class I've ever taken where you have to wear mandatory socks to grip the ballet bar. I'm actually nervous.


FREE Cupcakes tomorrow (...will this ever end?)

No Shame Productions